Ariana answers questions on "Confidence in Sex"

Is it possible to create sexual chemistry, when there might not be any to start with?

Yes in some cases, no in others.

Sexual chemistry involves a complex interaction of factors and is an interesting area to me.

Sometimes it is possible to alter one or several factors and have the outcome change to create sexual chemistry or improve the chance of it happening.

One simple example of this would be where people matched up well in terms of personality and were good friends, but one person just didn't "fancy" the other. It is possible to alter someone's physical appearance via diet and exercise to a degree. In some cases that could be enough to add extra "zing" between the couple.

Another example is if a person is concentrating on their partner's negative side. A shift in focus to help balance the picture by also seeing positives, can improve sexual chemistry. In this case, the mind is being used to produce change.

In other cases there could be some underlying sexual chemistry yet to surface and all that's needed is a "spark" to set it off. In this case, a change of setting could help – an environmental change. People often find that when they go away on holiday, they feel more in the mood for sex. Altering the environment can alter mood. Choice of colours, for example, in both surroundings and clothes worn can influence mood and you can alter this to help create a different effect. It's what stage lighting people have known for years.

There are some things that can be changed, while others are more difficult. One of the things that someone cannot easily alter, is the will or intent of another person. In this case "will" could be a limiting factor and the potential for chemistry reduced or absent altogether.

One area that interests me surrounds the "spirit" zone on my diagram. It's very common for people to join dating agencies and have all the boxes ticked against their "ideal" person – yet when that person turns up, there's no chemistry. What's going on?

I think part of the answer lies in human energy field research. Every one of us possesses a bio-magnetic field around the body. This area holds information about a person's chakra system or subtle energy bodies. I believe it also holds information about all the positive and negative things that have made an imprint on it. This energy field is like a magnetic force. Sometimes the poles of a magnet will attract, other times they will repel, depending on how they are lined up and, interestingly, also depending on the presence of other magnets in the vicinity. We have all been in circumstances where we feel we "click" with another person, or feel a sense of harmony. I think one of the reasons for this is to do with how our energy field interacts or "resonates" with the other person.

I believe it's possible to alter this bio-magnetic field around the body and affect the way we resonate with another, making our own field around the body strong, healthy and more likely to attract people of complimentary "wavelengths". Many things go up to make the human energy field. All of the chakras play a part in the health of it and it is possible to balance these, to make the field stronger and create more harmony in the energetic body.

One major thing that influences the field around the body, in my opinion, is the way we feel about ourselves. Some people think that if only they could change their partner, then everything would be fine. This attitude weakens personal power, because in having this attitude, they’re giving away too much responsibility to another person for how they feel. People are responsible for their own feelings and shouldn't give anyone else the chance to decide how they feel.

If we feel bad or good about ourselves, it is detected by others in the magnetic fields around our bodies in a subtle way. For example, if we are high in self-esteem, it will attract more respect; if we are judgemental towards ourselves, it will attract more criticism. If we are loving, we attract kindness.

This can be a powerful learning tool, because it means that whatever qualities we want to attract in another person, we first need to adopt in ourselves. It also fits in with Karmic Laws.

Some things weaken the human aura, such as illness, stress, poor diet and in my opinion, some interactions with other strong magnetic forces. This area requires much further research.